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Signs someone secretly dislikes you, according to psychology

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It’s a hard truth to swallow, but not everyone may like you.

Sometimes, it’s not obvious. People can be perfectly polite while hiding their true feelings. So, how do you tell if someone secretly dislikes you?

Psychology has the answer. There are subtle signs and behaviors that can reveal someone’s true feelings towards you.

In this article, we’ll explore 9 signs that someone might be harboring negative feelings towards you, even if they’re keeping it under wraps.

Stay tuned – you might just learn something new about human behavior and the people around you.

1) They avoid eye contact
Eye contact is a fundamental part of human interaction.

In a normal conversation, people tend to make eye contact around 30 to 60% of the time. This shows that they are engaged, interested and comfortable.

However, when someone secretly dislikes you, they might avoid making eye contact with you. This could be a subconscious way of distancing themselves from you.

Of course, it’s essential to remember that this isn’t always a clear-cut sign. Some people might just be shy or anxious, which can also lead to reduced eye contact.

But if you notice this behavior along with some other signs on this list, it might be a hint that someone is not as fond of you as they may seem.

2) Their body language seems off
Body language can speak louder than words.

Take a situation I found myself in recently. I had a coworker who always seemed pleasant in conversation. However, I couldn’t help but notice that her body language didn’t match her words.

Whenever we spoke, she would cross her arms, lean away from me, or avoid facing me directly. These are classic signs of discomfort or disinterest.

Despite her polite conversation, her body language sent a clear message that she wasn’t comfortable around me.

Like in my situation, if you notice someone’s body language doesn’t align with their words, it could be a sign they harbor negative feelings towards you.

3) They rarely initiate conversation
Conversation is a two-way street.

Typically, if someone likes you, they’ll be eager to engage in conversation with you. They’ll ask you questions about your day, your interests, or anything else that might spark a conversation.

But when someone secretly dislikes you, they might avoid starting conversations with you. They’ll respond if spoken to, but they won’t make the effort to initiate the dialogue themselves.

Did you know that according to a study, people who like each other tend to use similar language patterns? If someone isn’t making an effort to match your conversation style or initiate chat, it could be a sign of concealed dislike.

Remember though, some people are naturally more reserved or introverted. This sign is most telling when the person is usually talkative with others but keeps conversations with you short and superficial.

4) They give you backhanded compliments
Compliments are usually heartwarming and uplifting. They make us feel good about ourselves, and they strengthen our connections with others.

However, when someone secretly dislikes you, their compliments might not feel so genuine. They might give you what’s known as a ‘backhanded compliment’. This is a remark that seems like a compliment on the surface, but when you think about it, it’s actually quite insulting or demeaning.

For example, they might say something like “You’re really confident for someone with your experience,” or “I wish I had the time to relax like you do”.

These kinds of remarks can leave you feeling unsettled and unsure about the person’s true feelings towards you.

5) They avoid spending time with you
Spending time together is one of the most basic ways we show interest in others.

When someone likes you, they’ll make an effort to spend time with you. They might invite you to lunch, ask you to join them for a coffee run, or suggest hanging out after work.

However, when someone secretly dislikes you, they’ll likely avoid these kinds of invitations. They might always seem to be too busy, or they might make excuses not to hang out with you.

Of course, some people are just naturally more private or introverted. But if this behavior is combined with other signs on this list, it might indicate a hidden dislike.

6) They never seem to remember personal details
We all forget things from time to time, but when someone constantly forgets personal details you’ve shared, it could be a sign they’re not as invested in the relationship as you are.

Think about it. When we care about someone, we tend to remember the little things about them – their likes, dislikes, stories they’ve shared, and even their preferred coffee order.

These details matter because they show we’re paying attention and that we value our connection with them.

However, when someone repeatedly forgets these details – your birthday, your favorite book, or the name of your pet – it might be a signal that they don’t value your relationship as much as you’d hoped.

7) They’re dismissive of your feelings and opinions
Everyone is entitled to their own feelings and opinions. A healthy relationship, whether it’s a friendship, a work relationship, or a romantic relationship, involves mutual respect, even in disagreements.

I remember once sharing my views on a controversial topic with someone I thought was a friend. Instead of engaging in a respectful discussion, they dismissed my opinion outright. They didn’t seem interested in understanding my perspective, and their attitude made me feel insignificant and unvalued.

If you find that someone is regularly dismissive of your thoughts and emotions, it could be a sign they harbor negative feelings towards you. Healthy relationships involve active listening and respect for each other’s viewpoints, even when they differ.

Remember, everyone has the right to disagree, but how they handle the disagreement can reveal a lot about their feelings towards you.

8) They’re constantly competitive with you
A little friendly competition can be healthy, but when someone is always trying to one-up you or prove they’re better, it could be a sign of hidden dislike.

Healthy relationships involve supporting each other’s successes, not turning everything into a competition.

If someone always needs to be the best or constantly tries to outdo you, it suggests they may see your success as a threat rather than something to celebrate.

This constant need to compete can stem from feelings of jealousy, insecurity, or dislike. It’s important to recognize this behavior for what it is and not let it impact your self-worth.

SOURCE: Global English Editor

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